Hey Hey, Ho Ho, Keep the Profits with the CEOs
You say health gap, I say wealth gap.
Stock options, yes! Public Option, no!
Your pain, our gain.
Walk. It. Off.
Wealthcare, Not Healthcare!
Fear, Lies, Sedition! Pre-Existing-Condition!
You Deserve the Healthcare you can Afford:
Healthcare is a service and those who can pay more deserve better service. For instance, if a school is burning down and my cat is stuck in a tree, the fire department should get my cat out of the tree first because I can pay a higher premium for their time and effort.
Don’t give the government your money! We are happy to keep gouging you instead.
Government efficiency. Where’s the profit in that?
The current system works… FOR US!:
We like the current system: we get to insure the healthy and offload the sick to taxpayers.
How so? When any one of the 47 million uninsured Americans need care they go to the emergency room – at 5 times the cost of a doctor’s visit! – Taxpayers are already footing that bill nice and quietly everyday. And hospitals get to charge full market rates while we only insure wealthy, healthy customers. It’s a win-win! Well, maybe not for taxpayers…
Sick people are bad for good profits.
We’re a business. We have to cut the weak links in the chain. Sick
people are those weak links.
Some people say the healthcare system is broken. But it works for us.
Just like Congress.
Just imagine all of the new businesses or creative energy people would invest their time and true talents in if they weren’t chained to a job they hated just for “healthcare benefits”. My gawd, ask anyone at the country club – there are way too many nouveau-riche already!
We’re happy to accept people with pre-existing conditions: health,
wealth, and youth.
Healthcare is a commodity, not a right.
You want insurance AND a house?! And you call ME greedy?
You think YOU’RE spending a lot on healthcare? Heck, we employ 6
lobbyists for every member of Congress.
We deny more claims before 8am than Medicare does all day.
Because nothing says “freedom” like denying claims.
We believe in a free market. We should be free to deny coverage at will.
We’re here to stand up for Freedom of Recision.
Some people might call these the real death panels, but its merely good business: we dump customers from our rolls when they become too sick to cover. Just last year three of our health care insurance companies saved $300 million by kicking out a mere 20,000 customers! And about that woman with breast cancer that President Obama mentioned? Are you trying to tell me that acne isn’t a preexisting condition to cancer? But make no mistake, people don’t want the gov’t deciding who should get care. They are happy to leave it up to us and our legions of anonymous temps using strict cost-to-profit ratios.